Tag Archives | unfunny commentary

Nearly a Week, Pretty Weak

It’s hard to believe that’s it’s been nearly a week since my last ride. A wide range of things came between me and precious, calorie burning saddle time. Such things as traveling to multiple soccer games, a post-season soccer party, time restraints, family duties, and on a few occasions, just not giving a shit.

Today, time and giving a shit came together and I was finally able to get out for a dirt road ride north of town.

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Lighter Fare

After spending most of my free time pondering and writing about the death of one of my favorite writers and personalities, I have little left to offer other than a few pics and words from what was a pretty good Thursday of “doing stuff.”

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I Am Your King

I shall henceforth be known as The King of The Morons, for my stupidity knows no boundaries, my idiocy no limits, and my moronicness remains supreme above all others. I am the absolute ruler of all things absurdly stupid. You, my fellow morons, shall address me as King or as Supreme Ruler. If you’re not a moron I encourage you to just step over me as I lie in the gutter slack-jawed with sick on my shirt. BUT ALL OTHERS SHALL BOW BEFORE ME AND ADDRESS ME SO!!

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Getting Stupid

At the end of my last post, I talked about heading into the woods to do something stupid that morning. Me doing something stupid in the woods might lead readers to believe that I was going to be cooking up meth in an abandoned hunting blind or having sex with a woodpecker hole riddled tree carcass. While both of those things are stupid, and more than a little fun to entertain thoughts of doing, I did not. It was stupider.

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Stomp The Neithercut

Monday’s are usually a shit show for me, and this Monday would try its hardest to bring fecal matter to the dick-tip of this week’s production, but I counter attacked with some fecalness of my own. WIN!

Right out of the gate I had an 8 AM appointment with my eye doctor. Afterward, I would have plenty of time to ride, fuck about, or actually get some work done, but I declined. Instead, I packed my camera and boots and after my appointment, I drove straight to the Neithercut Woodlands about 25 minutes north of town to get a few miles of hiking in.

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Every Inch (of my love)

Me last week:

I know that some back and hip pain a few years ago, combined with the lack of a need to “train,” derailed my mountain biking but I’m not sure when I just gave up on it. In any event, I don’t plan on letting that happen anymore. I am promising myself to return to riding trails once a week at the very least.

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Looking Down

I had hoped to return to the dirt roads for some miles on Tuesday morning, but heavy thunderstorms overnight and morning rain had me thinking otherwise. The idea of the fresh dirt put down by the county combined with heavy rain was not something I felt like putting myself—or my drivetrain—through. So, I headed into the wet woods to stomp out a couple of miles with my camera before getting home to do what I do. Which is hard to put into words, so I won’t.

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Frogs & Yoga Pants

My morning ride time lurched towards me like a salt covered slug and I was thinking of a reason—any reason—not to ride other than “I just want to drink coffee and watch our Nation continue to burn down around me on the inter-web-o-sphere and then go hide under the covers and wish it all away.” Well, it turns out that some oncoming thunderstorms would have a say in my decision.

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