Tag Archives | being a slacker

Memories of Hamburger Helper

By soiledchamois on February 2, 2025 in Random

I think it might have something to do with my recently departed father, but I have been craving Hamburger Helper. I’ll explain.

Back when I was a kid in the mid-80s, the factory my dad worked at shut down, and he was out of work for two or three years as mill after mill in the Western Pennsylvania area closed. During that time my mother worked as a receptionist for a doctor, and my dad was put in charge of getting me dinner.

Chili, hot dogs, box mac ‘n’ cheese, chili, cheap fast food, frozen french fries, more chili, and, of course, LOTS of Hamburger Helper were all part of our weekly menus.

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Repetitive Goodness

By soiledchamois on January 31, 2025 in Outdoors

Every one of my lumbers this week has been nearly the same. Oddly, that’s not really a bad thing.

The loops were all five miles in length, or just over. The temps were warmer (in the 20s and low 30s compared to -2˚ last week); however, while warmer, the temps have not been warm enough to melt the snow in the woods, barring a few small areas that receive direct sunlight. And that meant continuing to lumber over lumpy, slippery snow that makes for slow going, adding handfuls of minutes onto my average pace and taking its toll on my knees and darkened mind.

But hey, all that is just me trying to make my lumbers in the woods sound like something like more than a fat man walking trails in a futile attempt to feel better about himself.

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Aches, Goals, Grooves, and Clutches

By soiledchamois on January 29, 2025 in Outdoors

As January weeks go, this one has been pretty darn OK-ish so far. I mean, after recent weeks, it really didn’t take much to improve, but I’ll take it.

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Starting Somewhere

By soiledchamois on January 21, 2025 in Outdoors

My three-day streak of nothingness continues (sort of).

The 2025 Ignorance is Bliss Tour (#stayignernt) has hit a snag in the form of no actual lumbering happening outdoors due to the extreme cold and my lack of owning “extreme” cold weather gear. I’m pretty good with the stuff I have down into the single digits, but extended time below-zero type stuff starts to be “shit for the birds,” as Grandma Helen used to say. I also have little desire to be out in such temps, especially since my camera battery would hold a charge for about 10 minutes in -4˚ temps (the temp as of 8:25 AM) and leave me with nothing to distract me from said extreme cold.

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Late Weekend Posts

By soiledchamois on December 9, 2024 in Outdoors

For what it’s worth (absolutely nothing, say it again, ya’ll), I had this crap written and ready to go on Sunday morning, but then I got sucked into a vacuous black hole of software updates on an outdated Mac and all the joys that come with it and missed my time frame. So, now I have to edit all over again, AND my Monday post will be pushed back because I feel like if I post two in one day, it makes me look like a psychopath without a real life outside of this digital word salad.

Thanks, management

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So Much Food

By soiledchamois on December 1, 2024 in Cat 5 Cooking

My Cat 5 Cooking exploits are infamous around these parts. And a recent look through my files informed me that I take WAY too many shitty photos of the food I cook and the beers I drink. Certainly, I could be using this brain power for good rather than self-indulgent idiocy. But, as Peter (Criss) allegedly might have said to Paul (Stanley), “Like, whatever it takes to get through the day, man.”

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Keepin’ It Dank

By soiledchamois on November 25, 2024 in Outdoors

In Friday’s post, I made a ridiculous and bold proclamation that I would do some treadmilling to offset the beers I planned on consuming whilst watching the football all weekend. I have no shame in admitting I did no such thing.

A week of lumbering 25+ miles in the cold, dank woods had my aging bones perfectly content to be warm inside, close to a kitchen stocked with food and adult beverages, with slippered feet up while sitting in my favorite chair, remote in hand, yelling at the TV, and being a goof as two bulldogs fart, burp, snore, and stink up the living room. It’s kind of my weekend “thing.”

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Frosty Lumbers

By soiledchamois on November 13, 2024 in Outdoors

As I recently posted, Monday morning’s 6-mile lumber was an unusually warm one. However, a few hours later, the winds picked up, and the temps dropped as if they were blowing directly from the frigid teat of a witch (the one that lives in a shed just outside of Zama City, Alberta).

With that, Tuesday morning’s 6-mile lumber was a cold one and a full 20˚ colder than the day before. Ahhh… normality. Well, at least weather-wise.

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Slack and Thereafter

By soiledchamois on November 11, 2024 in Outdoors

After I finished tending to the last of the leaves on Friday, I showered and headed out for weekend provisions. That would be the last time I left the open borders of the Cul De Sac Shack for 48 hours.

No, I wasn’t depressed and hunkered down in The Bed of Torment or hiding out from the roving gangs of newly deputized MAGA Brownshirts rounding up the Libs, freethinkers, educated, and creatives for the internment camps; I simply had no reason to go out—so I didn’t. And it was pretty darn OK.

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Miles and A Buck 50

By soiledchamois on October 30, 2024 in Outdoors

I made some idle threats to run on the treadmill over the weekend but opted for voting, watching footy, beers, sexy time, food making, and slack. Not all activities were done at the same time, but some were done concurrently.

Come Monday, I was back in the woods to start another week of lumbering. Now it’s Wednesday, I have 15+ miles in my feetz, and I should hit 110 miles for the month after tomorrow’s effort. Not a bad month for lumbering. I wish I could say as much for the state of my brain, but I’ll take what I can get.

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