Tag Archives | feeling mental

Did You Think I Was Dead?

Content with my own thoughts in my own head
That’s because I thought you was dead.

Remember when I did three lumbers in a row last week, and I was stoked to be getting life back to normal and hopeful of hitting my 25-mile weekly lumbering goal for the first time in weeks? Me neither; it seems like years ago.

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Lazy and Sick

After three lumbers and 17+ miles this week, I was handed a bag full of warm feecus in the form of a mystery illness that knocked me flat on my ass late afternoon Wednesday, and as of Friday morning, it’s still knocking.

What started as some mild post-nasal drip reminiscent of some spring allergies had every inch of my skin hurting by late afternoon Wednesday, and I found myself in bed under roughly five blankets, trying to stay warm by 8 PM.

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Five Years in Seven Days

I can’t even wrap my head around the fact that at this time last week, I was en route from Michigan to my late father’s house in Pennsylvania to help my family clean out and dumpster the plethora of junk in it. Since then, I’ve come back to Michigan on Monday, found out my mother-in-law passed away that evening, returned to Pennsylvania on Thursday for the service, and BACK to Michigan on Friday.

The rollercoaster of emotions between two different family deaths and miles traveled has me feeling like I’ve lived five different years in one week.

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Getting Worser

Part I Things Got Worser

After nearly 20 years of writing this bullshit, I still don’t consider myself a writer. Mostly because I have zero formal training as one, and often, my posts are an unintelligible scrambled mess of thoughts. So, to say I have “writer’s block” sounds stupid, but I really have been at a loss for words this week, and I have tried writing this post about 4 times. Mostly because the past week has been a whirlwind of travel and, unfortunately, more sadness.

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Thoughts of Emerald Lake

In the summers of 1999 through 2004,1 Wifey and I would drive from Pittsburgh to Colorado to ride bikes, hike, and goof off in the most amazing mountains my untraveled eyes had ever seen; the Rocky Mountains. It was quite the adventure for two Western Pennsylvania flatlanders who, during most of that time, lived in an apartment in what I think qualified as “the city,” given our proximity to traffic, tall buildings, and the sounds of nighttime gunshots.

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Lumbers and Breaks

After I got home from running some errands last Friday, I shut the garage door and didn’t leave the house again until 7:40 AM on Monday.

I have little desire to go out of the house if it’s not a hike, groceries, or beer shopping. I have little need for the American public, and the American public has little need for me. It’s your classic win-win sitch between a couple of assholes.

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Weeks, Days, Birds, & Dead Beers

The Week: Even though I came up well short of my already abbreviated for winter 20-mile lumbering goal, I still managed to have a good week of “doing stuff” by re-embracing the trainer and logging over 26 virtual MyWhoosh miles in addition to the 14 miles of snowshoeing. It’s not ideal, but it’s getting me through the last weeks/months of winter with no ropes taken to attics. Yet.

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The Brain, Am I right?

Late in March 2024, I was enduring a spell of multiple injuries to my back, knee, and both feet due to age, overuse, and an accident while caring for Jake (the dog).

I was really struggling, and lumbering was super painful. So, after much nervousness, anxiety, and bouts of “what the fuck is wrong with my brain?” I stuffed myself into some bike kit, got on board my trainer in the basement, and rode a bike for the first time in 2 years, 4 months, and 26 days. It was pretty OK, and I would do it again a few more times during my recovery.

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Ignorant Bliss: Month Three

I was back in the woods for a lumber today, and I’m not going to lie to you; it was pretty much just like the rest of the week. Cold but moderate temps, snow on the ground, the sun behind the grey clouds, and my fat ass stumbling down the trail in search of miles in my feetz.

I will spare you any more details of another dull hike, but I will say I did hit my (abbreviated for winter) 20-mile weekly goal, and that leaves me with three days to hit the trainer in the basement and to slack as needed.

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Memories of Hamburger Helper

I think it might have something to do with my recently departed father, but I have been craving Hamburger Helper. I’ll explain.

Back when I was a kid in the mid-80s, the factory my dad worked at shut down, and he was out of work for two or three years as mill after mill in the Western Pennsylvania area closed. During that time my mother worked as a receptionist for a doctor, and my dad was put in charge of getting me dinner.

Chili, hot dogs, box mac ‘n’ cheese, chili, cheap fast food, frozen french fries, more chili, and, of course, LOTS of Hamburger Helper were all part of our weekly menus.

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