Blessed Be Thy Foam Roller



I have had this torture device for a while now, but never really took the time to use it. Then after suffering with some mild back discomfort (most likely due to my half assed weight lifting technique at the gym) the past few days, I decided to take the time and watch some videos (like the one below) on the proper use and how to really fuck myself over with it.

Sweet Jesus, Mary and Joseph! 10 minutes of rolling the back, hips, glutes, hammies and quads and I feel like I smoked a bowl, let a fire truck back over me, drank a six pack, had sex for an hour (or my standard 42 seconds), let a fire truck back over me, stared at a fish tank, took a valium, farted multiple times, let a fire truck back over me, took big giant dump and then let a fire truck back over me. In other words– it felt goooood! And hurt like a BITCH! Then felt goooood….

Let me illustrate how I feel with the use of this video…

I wanted to use this (not all that work appropriate) .gif to illustrate how swell I feel, but I didn’t.

I really can’t believe I waited so long to learn the proper(ish) way to use the freaking thing! I really need to start introducing it into my regular, everyday flagellations.

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