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Fear & Loathing Lance While On The Trainer

By on November 15, 2013 in Cycling, Random

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I wouldn’t say that I have anything against Lance Armstrong (except the lying, cheating, megalomania, sociopathy and making me feel like a Goddamn fool for all those years I supported him and his teams as they doped themselves to the gills to win bike races). And I wouldn’t dare to say that Lance does–or ever has–smoked grass, done mescaline, high powered blotter acid, cocaine, or a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers, raw ether or amyls.

But I do think that he obviously got locked into a serious drug collection and had the tendency is to push it as far as he could. Only his drug collection had more to do with EPO and the like rather than Hunter S. Thompson’s laundry list of illegal, mild to hardcore and dangerous, recreational drugs.

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Taking Advantage

By on November 14, 2013 in Mountain Biking, Random

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In between my days at the gym I have been trying to get out and enjoy the dirt before the snow flies. As you can see from the ground in the pic above, it has been flying here and there but it has a long way to go before it causes any worry or would make me think about maybe regretting not purchasing a fat bike.

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Forest Facts

By on November 11, 2013 in Mountain Biking, Random

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I cannot be certain if a falling tree makes a sound when no one is around, but I am quite certain that if a tree falls in a forest it will ALWAS find its way across the trail. It’s a fact.

 

Ignoring The Facts

By on November 10, 2013 in Cycling, Random

I find it amusing sad how long I can ignore the fact that spring and summer are gone and now fall is on the cusp of doing the same. Looking down the trail and seeing nothing but brown, bare trees is sort of a repeated slap in my fat face to wake up and smell the decaying bung of autumnal death and keep riding as long as I can. For soon winter will be bending me over a barrel of dark cold ass depression and thrusting its unprotected frozen phallus of hate in my general direction.

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This fact was made all the more real today when at the ride’s end I stood in the parking lot talking to some friends and was getting hit in the face with a smorgasbord of gusting wind, leaves, rain, sleet and snow. Then the sun came out. Michigan weather is as psycho as mountain weather…. we just don’t have mountains.

Didn’t Feel Right

By on November 7, 2013 in Random

Something just didn’t feel right about my last– now hibernating– post about our local Ghost Bike. I read it like 500 times, but something was off in what I was trying to convey. So I put it away for a bit. On to regular business…

Thinking About The White Bike

By on November 7, 2013 in Cycling, Random

A few days ago I mentioned that during my ride I went by a newly erected Ghost Bike memorial. While I didn’t know the teenager who lost his life at that intersection last month, as a life long “bike rider” and a cyclist of over 20 years, it was hard to ride by and not feel some sort of sadness and emotion. I felt that however sad it was to see, the bike both honored the deceased and served a reminder to motorists that we cyclists are out there. And I am pretty sure that is what I was supposed to think.

Then Monday morning (just before my 24 hour plague hit), I was chatting with a friend of mine who is a good bit older than my wife and I and has lived around our community most of, if not all of her life. In fact, she lives on one of the dirt roads that I often ride down, just a couple of miles from where the Ghost Bike now sits.

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Fast ‘N Loud On Dirt Roads

By on November 5, 2013 in Random

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I believe I may have watched way too much Fast N’ Loud the past few days, given that the first thing I thought of when I rode past this old F150 on Sunday was “I wonder what the guys from Gas Monkey Garage could do to that?” Later on that day, a little bit of Googling would have me not at all surprised to see that they have indeed worked on an older, badass F100 in Fast N’ Loud, Episode 6. Check out the pics on KC (the paint dude’s) blog.

Still, I found myself rolling along thinking that if I was Richard from Fast N’ Loud, I’d say– “I picked up this old Ford F150 for $1,800 along a dirt road in the middle of Bum-F*ck, Michigan. Now it’s time to get it back to the “bearded wonder,” so he can turn it around by next week and I can get it to auction to make some fat cash and pay the bills. Thinkin’ maybe we’ll drop it, get a new exhaust on, some new wheels from our friends at JagOff Custom Wheelz N’at™ and have KC throw on a killer two-toned black paint job to make it badass and scary rolling down the road.”

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But as we all know, I am SO not Richard from Fast N’ Loud, so I would probably just buy it, get it painted back, have it not run, park it in a field and have some chick in a green bikini stand beside it.

I’m thinking it would be unwise to go back and make an offer on it.

Top photo credit: Me.
Bottom photo credit: Hell, I don’t know, it came up when I Googled: Ford F150 truck, black, field, girl, green bikini, Auburn fan. This was the only photo that came up, so I used it.

Dealing With The Plague

By on November 5, 2013 in Random

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After a nice ride on Sunday I was feeling pretty good and had a pretty good evening; I had a good dinner, a couple of beers and headed off to bed with plans of hitting the gym in the morning to get back at the weights. But…

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