Crush Pasta V

 

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There was a tradition started long ago by someone, somewhere that says eating pork on New Year’s brings good luck (probably started by the pork people). I like good luck, but I’m not a huge fan of pork (roasts, etc.,), so I ventured as close as I really wanted to into the world of pork and made my Soiled Bolognese Sauce on New Year’s Day, which just so happens to include about a 1/2 pound of ground pork along with a 1/2 pound of ground chuck. Win.

There are lots of different recipes for Bolognese sauce out there on the interwebs and mine is sort of a mashup of many of them, meaning it’s dumbed down, made Cat 5-ish and without a doubt would be considered white trashy to hard-core, up above it all, Bon Appétit reading foodies. Since I’m bored, haven’t had a chance to get outside to ride this week due to dad duties and have absolutely nothing else to do, here’s a look at mine.

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As with most Bolognese recipes, mine starts with dicing up some onions, carrots and celery and sautéing them in olive oil. When the onions are just about translucent a 1/2 pound of ground pork and a 1/2 pound of ground chuck is added. You then continue sautéing on medium heat.

When the meat is just about cooked, add a small can of tomato paste and mixed through. Then comes a 1/2 cup of red wine. Some recipes call for white, I like it with red, so I use a half cup of $5 crap red wine that tastes like paint thinner in a glass but just fine in the sauce.

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I let the wine cook off for a few minutes before adding a 28 oz. can of crushed tomatoes, followed by a half can of water (14 oz.). I then add in some red pepper flakes, black pepper and a bit of Mrs. Dash Italian Seasoning. Once mixed through, I reduce the heat and let the sauce simmer for up to two hours. This about the time I pour another beer and go watch some footy (known as soccer to America).

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I like to stop by the stove every so often (usually during pee breaks) to make sure the sauce isn’t bubbling too much, splattering the stove top and lighting a fire under Wifey’s ass about the mess I’m making, and give the sauce a stir. I also utilize this time to pour another beer and get back to watching football.

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When the sauce is nearly done, I start adding in pinches of kosher salt. I like to add a bit; stir. Add a bit; stir, etc., etc., etc., until I get the taste I want. I recently read some Bolognese recipes that add in a cup of whole milk at the end before removing from heat. I had never done that in the past, but did this time and I do think it added to the creaminess of the sauce.

Once I’m finally out of beers and there is no more football left to watch I put some good chunky pasta on to boil, grate some Romano cheese and set about shoveling plates of pasta in my face like I’ve never had food before roughly 10 minutes later.

It remains to be seen if a half pound of ground pork in a Bolognese sauce will bring me good luck in 2015, but it couldn’t hurt and I enjoyed multiple plates of pasta. I also can’t say this recipe is all that healthy, I’m sure it’s not (especially the part where I drink multiple beers while making it), but once in a while it’s just the ticket to help with my crushing of pasta.

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Here’s hoping for better luck and not being a dead beat, non-working doofus in 2015. Now it’s time to put the pasta on, ’cause I gots me a bunch of leftover Bolognese sauce* with no delivery vehicle.

Later.

*Note: Last photo is from the leftover pasta crushing madness that came later. I think this sauce is actually better a day or two later.

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