Tag Archives | sorry attempts at humor

Falling Turkeys & Some Wood Ducks

Monday: Another subpar weekend is in the books. Why so subpar, emo kid? Not sure, but I do know that while I am feeling WAY better than I was a couple weeks ago, physically, I STILL don’t feel 100%, and resting and not “doing stuff” actually makes me feel worse, which is a bit screwed up.

With that said, on Monday, I was happy to be back to my weekday routine of early morning lumbers, even if it does still feel like winter, and the 5.80-mile hike ended with large snowflakes blowing around, making it seem like I’m living the same sickly and wintry mindfuck every gahdamn day; dealing with low-grade illness while enduring a frozen hell on earth (IF you don’t mind me getting a tad hyperbolic).

The woods also continue to have a very UN-spring-like feel to them, with very few plants even thinking about blossoming. The critters are lying low, and the pre-spring colors are a pallet of brown, tan, and grey. If it were a Crayon color, it would be Sock Covered in Cat Puke or Dead Wet Rat.

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Goals Met, Stats Checked

Within the 2025 Lumbering bylaws, no rule explicitly says that my self-imposed 25-mile weekly goal needs to be completed over consecutive days. Only that between Monday and Sunday, I hike 25 miles or more.

Knowing that I had an appointment with Doctor Bob on Thursday morning, I figured I might as well take the whole day off from “doing stuff” and save my final lumber for early Saturday morning.

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Cherishing The Experiences

The weather people were calling for snow, rain, freezing rain, and high winds today, and they were not wrong. None of that stopped me from going for a lumber, but I was admittedly less than thrilled. Until I got in the woods.

There was an inch or so of wet April snow on the ground when I pulled into the empty parking lot to start my hike, and the clouds were hanging lower than an octogenarian’s tool bag as I set off down the park path toward the trails.

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Lumbers and Germanic History

I figured I might as well keep a “not bad” thing going, and I was once again in bed before sunset last night. The result was I woke up more refreshed and rested than I had in nearly two flu-ridden weeks. It only took 13 days, but I’ll take what I can get.

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A Much Needed Return

I am quite used to dealing with large gaps for such things as my résumé, my memory, and the distance between pants buttons and their holes, but in my “fitness” calendar, not so much.

I know, the sentence above makes it sound like I am some whispy fitness junkie who has 2% body fat, runs like a gazelle, and eats like a bird. But as we all know, or should know, I fill my calendar with lumbers, snowshoes, hikes, walks, runs, and rides as much as I can to make up for the fact that I am a 53-year-old man who loves to cook, drink IPAs, and works like a dog just to limit my pounds overweight to 50 and to keep my mind centered and in the present rather than racing with self-loathing, doubt, depression, and anxiety.

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Thoughts of Emerald Lake

In the summers of 1999 through 2004,1 Wifey and I would drive from Pittsburgh to Colorado to ride bikes, hike, and goof off in the most amazing mountains my untraveled eyes had ever seen; the Rocky Mountains. It was quite the adventure for two Western Pennsylvania flatlanders who, during most of that time, lived in an apartment in what I think qualified as “the city,” given our proximity to traffic, tall buildings, and the sounds of nighttime gunshots.

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Lumbers and Breaks

After I got home from running some errands last Friday, I shut the garage door and didn’t leave the house again until 7:40 AM on Monday.

I have little desire to go out of the house if it’s not a hike, groceries, or beer shopping. I have little need for the American public, and the American public has little need for me. It’s your classic win-win sitch between a couple of assholes.

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More Bunny Tales

Over the past couple of years, I have had a couple posts about rabbits.

There was the time I accidentally hit one with my car as I drove to the trails to lumber and, ironically, attempt to take photos of wildlife. That one hit hard.

Then, last summer, there were three baby bunnies, alone, snuggled up in a small hole in the backyard, that I had to safely remove before mowing the grass and then saw them reunite with Mama Bunny before bed that night.

Now I have another one.

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A Little Less Conversation

As I’ve mentioned previously, Wifey is out of town for work and three hours behind, and B is at school an hour away in East Lansing, so I am home and very alone. This is probably why my posts have been rambling word salads that could have been reduced to a paragraph.

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