After last week’s brilliant (for me) return to the saddle and near daily riding, this week has be quite the opposite. As of mid morning today (Saturday) I’ve ridden twice this week. Tuesday’s 42 mile road/gravel ride and Friday’s quick “better than the trainer” 23 mile gravel ride. Sigh.
I’m lacking time for my normal verbal diarrhea of a blog post, so I’m going all crap sales meeting Power Point presentation on you [not really] and doing it all with bullet points of random information nonsense. The only thing missing is a wig wearing sales director in a bad suit, bored as hell employees doodling sketches of him being chased by an angry bear with a knife and poor slide graphics (not designed by the in-house graphic artist, but instead downloaded from the web at 72 dpi and enlarged stretched to 900 dpi for that cool, “What the hell is that a graphic of?” look).
Today is Tuesday, which (as I touched on before) means two things: the time for me to get a weekday ride in and for rain to descend upon Michiganderburgh. Oh Tuesday, I might hate you. Actually, I KNOW I hate you. Stupid non-feeling, rainy ass day.
My plan for Saturday morning was this: get up, drink 2 to 14 cups of Bust Ass Coffee, eat some sort of lame breakfast, watch football (YES!!!) and then head out to ride some singletrack north of town. All of that was on course to happen until I checked the radar on Weather-dot-look-at-all-these-ads-and lame human interest videos-dot-com and saw that my trails appeared to be getting pissed down on with rain by the uncontrollable, loose bladder of Ma Nature.
Plan B was activated.
Plan B was to grab the El Mariachi and head out for a couple of hours or so of pavement and dirt roads. Obviously not my first choice (made fucking obvious by the fact that it’s Plan B, NOT Plan A. But dirt is dirt, miles are miles, calories burnt are calories burnt and a fat, crap cyclist is a fat, crap cyclist).
Upon fetching the El Mariachi (my current “go-to” gravel road bike that is really just a hardtail mountain bike) from the Not-So-Stankment®, I realized that in a raging fit of laziness [surprised?] I failed to rinse the bike off after Tuesday’s muddy dirt road ride. No big, I sort of like riding around with what amounts to an extra 2 to 5 pounds of dried cement on my frame. What’s a few extra pounds of dried cement on my bike when I’m already sporting at least 15 extra pounds of beer, pizza and general fuck-up-ness around my ever broadening and bouncing midriff??? Nothing!
I’m not going to lie, I HATE Michigan winters. Of course, I also hated every one of the, slightly shorter Pennsylvania winters I experienced in my first thirty-nine years of life before moving here in 2010. On the flip side, MOST of my time here in Michigan has been blessed with some amazing summers and falls. I would have included spring, but our spring is the drunk, psychotic uncle of seasons; cloudy, cold, sunny, blustery, warm, rainy, icy, grey, humid and dry. However, this summer has been pretty darn excellent in the weather department; not too hot, not too humid and sunny most of the time. Except on Tuesdays.
It seems that Tuesdays in central Michigan are reserved for heavy rains, strong winds and storms. Tuesday also happens to be the day that Wifey has the option to work at home, which allows me to get out for a ride during the day. Sadly–more often than not–on the days she has done so, I have awoke in the morning to the sounds of rain blowing against the house. Today was no different.
My ride plan today included a 45 mile road ride. Mother Nature’s supposed weather plans had me alter that to 25 and some core work on the big physio ball of pain and some mid-evil stretching exercises.
It took two days, but I was finally able to get out on the bike for a road ride. It has also taken what seems like a lifetime to get out on the road and not have multiple layers of clothing on. Not to jinx it, but looking at the long-range forecast, it seems like spring and/or summer may have finally sprung for good here in Michiganderburgh.
Started off my ride on Friday by hitting the dirt and gravel roads on my cross bike. Many of the roads received a fresh dump of gravel this week and are still in the process of being graded. Some of the roads (like the one above) were fine, but others had some pretty deep sandy gravel on them and the Jake’s 35c tires were not having a great time of it.
The fresh, deep gravel was slowing things down a bit and since I got a later than usual start, I ditched them and jumped on some paved roads that are part of my standard road ride.
After mentally cracking for what may have been the 84th time in my life last week and vowing to spend the rest of this godforsaken endless winter under beer fueled fart smelling blankets in a curtains closed bedroom, I pulled up my grown fat man bibs and forced myself out into the snow to ride today. I have to say it was worth every second of the 21 minutes it took me to stuff my fat ass into three layers of cycling and cold weather gear.
The past “work” week did not hold much in the way of riding, just a short 15 mile mountain bike ride sandwiched in between 1.5 hour workouts at Maury’s. Thankfully that changed on Saturday, sort of.
