It only took 79 days (I think, you do the math) but I finally got a ride in on a bike with tires less than 3.8 inches wide. FUCK YEAH, SPRING!! (sort of).
Tag Archives | fucking weather
Fat-ish… Spring-ish?
It seems like forever since there’s been a legit blog post about me actually riding my bike (probably for the best as far as readers are concerned). There were a couple of days here and there that I may have been able to squeeze a ride in, but scheduling conflicts and/or weather fronts jacked my chances.
Still Longing For Dirt
I wish that I could say that the above photo was taken recently. Sadly, it is not… It’s a little too heavy on the tilt-shift photo from a March 2012 Soiled Chamois post.
Unlikely Inspirations
This week has been a strange one as far as me “doing stuff.” Sadly, it only allowed me one day of “real” riding: Wednesday’s hour and a half fat bike ride. The rest of the week has been a hodgepodge of trips to the gym and time spent on the trainer. Not the best of weeks, but better than many I’ve had.
I was up early today and had no problem convincing myself to get on the trainer.* The problem I had was actually forcing myself to pedal the bike on the trainer. The first minutes of my warm up were spent cursing the vile winter for forcing me to the trainer again and my belly which was bouncing off my legs like a gelatinous, beer filled, lycra covered sack with each pedal stroke. Cuss me! CUSS ME TO HELL! (or reasonable facsimile).
Ridin’ Bikes is Swell
After mentally cracking for what may have been the 84th time in my life last week and vowing to spend the rest of this godforsaken endless winter under beer fueled fart smelling blankets in a curtains closed bedroom, I pulled up my grown fat man bibs and forced myself out into the snow to ride today. I have to say it was worth every second of the 21 minutes it took me to stuff my fat ass into three layers of cycling and cold weather gear.
Spinning & Feeling Kneady
The stationary trainer is a strange beast. Hated by almost everyone and used by nearly as many, it allows for nothing but the vaguest feeling of actually riding your bike. In my opinion it’s WAY worse than running on a treadmill. Running sucks whether you are being chased by a gang of unruly thugs, doing a 5K, a marathon or on the treadmill at the gym… it just sucks. I respect and admire the folks who do it and enjoy it, but it sucks. When I do it, it hurts, it feels dumb and I ALWAYS think “this would be SO much better if I was on my bike.”
Cracked
It’s the time of the year when I have cracked. I have NO desire to ride in the ice, cold and snow, I hate my stationary trainer and the idea of going to the gym makes me a bit sick in the stomach. On top of that I let myself get sucked into reading daily updates from the Cyprus Sunshine Cup [seen above] and watching the Mellow Johnny’s Classic XC race online yesterday.
I need a real ride and some real dirt. Sadly, in looking at our 10 day forecast, I don’t see any relief from the snow and cold in our immediate future. I am trying really hard to hold my shit together, but with each passing day I anticipate the snug unwelcome grip of straight jacket. Deep breaths… Deep breaths….
Photo: Adelheid Morath (Sabine Spitz/Haibike Pro) during Stage 3 of the 2014 Cyprus Sunshine Cup
©Marius Maasewerd/EGO Promotion
Drinking Local (In The 989) III
I am a big fan of stouts, I am a bigger fan of imperial stouts, and I am an ever BIGGER fan of imperial stouts brewed by breweries located 1.1 miles from my home.
The Impervious Imperial Stout has been on tap at the Mt. Pleasant Brewing Tap Room my past couple visits. While I hope that it is still there this weekend, I am realistic that it may not be. Impervious is a higher ABV seasonal beer, brewed by a small brewery, that makes is both awesome and sad. Awesome because it tastes incredible and is brewed locally and sad because production isn’t huge and it won’t last long. And if there is one thing that can help a person survive the ice hardened snow and continued cold we’re experiencing this winter, it’s a delicious mind numbing imperial stout.
C’mon weekend! (Or maybe even Thursday night if I’m good).
The Seven Stages of Ice
Most of the paved roads surrounding my neck of Michiganderburgh are snow and ice-free. The dirt roads are however are not, nor is my driveway (seen above) or the neighborhood sidewalks.
I believe my driveway perfectly illustrates the Seven Levels of Ice that we are currently encountering (Six and Seven are not pictured above). The sixth levei is giant piles of frozen solid snow at the corner of every driveway, parking lot and sidewalk in town caused by copious amounts of shoveled and plowed snow, followed by rain and 40˚ temps which then froze solid when arctic temps and high winds returned last week.
The Seventh Level of Ice is two to three ice cubes direct from the kitchen freezer, placed in a high ball glass and covered with 4 fingers bourbon, vodka, scotch, gin or boxed wine of your choice.
Speaking of ice and wind, the National Weather Service has issued ANOTHER Winter Winter Advisory for the next 24 hours that includes: blowing snow, wind gusts reaching up to 35 mph and wind chills of minus twenty degrees. I really need the weekend (see next post) so I can give myself the green light to enjoy the Seventh Level (except in beer form).
That Hobo Taste
This photo has nothing to do with anything other than it’s the only photo in my recent stash that comes close to illustrating how I feel right now.