Tag Archives | not doing stuff

Scales

By soiledchamois on May 31, 2014 in Cycling

trailSAT

Yesterday (on the road for 41 miles), and today on the trail, was all about the scale. No, not the scale that tells me that I’ve gained 40 pounds since 2005 when I started this blog, fancied myself an endurance mountain bike racer who eventually realized he just likes to ride his bike on trails, gravel and roads, drink beer, eat good food and sometimes race, but the pain scale. I have to say, that even though I don’t like pain, I like this scale way more than that fucking, lying piece of shit in my bathroom… Forty pounds my ass!

This week has been made up of the following: riding, bitching, moaning, hate, expanding my liver, stretching, core work, ice therapy (to that area that makes up the gulf betweenst my two giant love handles) and adjustments to my riding position. Right now, things are going pretty darn, not bad. In fact, today I completed my normal 16 mile loop and on a pain scale of 1 to 10 I think it was merely a 4… maybe even a 3. Woot!

To go back a smidge, I got out yesterday on the road bike. I felt like shit… I felt great… I felt like shit… I felt great. Grrrr…

While I didn’t feel great over the entire 41 miles of crap Michigan roads, I felt well enough that I didn’t want to sell all my bikes and take up drinking and masturbation as my “go-to” hobbies (they will remain in the 2 and 3 slots).

And I as I said above, today’s slow/quick lap felt pretty OK… ish.

Later…. I have a couple other hobbies to take care of.

Waiting

By soiledchamois on May 13, 2014 in Random

IMG_4560b

Jake (the dog) never waits too long at the door before he’s back in the house to do what Jake (the dog) does best: sleep, fart, snore, eat, burp and sleep some more more before going back out to take a dump. And I did’t wait too long after Sunday’s blunderful crash to get back at trying to burn off the fleshy kegs attached to all sides of my torso. However, I did wait longer than I thought I would have to.

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The Non Ride Ride

By soiledchamois on May 3, 2014 in Cycling, Random

I woke up at 7 this morning to the sound of more rain pelting the windows. So, I rolled over and went back to sleep. An hour later the rain was slowing down, so I forced myself out of bed and downstairs to drink some coffee, watch some sub-par football and make sure Jake (the dog) didn’t shit the house.

As I ushered Jake off the porch I cursed the continued rain and chilly temps and conceded that I would most likely end up on the trainer today. Shit.

After a match and half of football, breakfast, about 200 ounces of coffee and multiple colon evacuations, I got caught up reading some stuff about the Giro online (maybe the greatest stage race of all time). Rain be damned, I was going for a ride!

I checked the radar (it looked like I would be OK), hurriedly got my gear together, kitted up and grabbed my cross bike. I would be road riding but my road bike is still on the trainer with a nasty ass, ever balding rear tire, so the Jake would have to do. I took off down the road and I just didn’t feel right on the bike. I pedaled to the edge of town and realized my saddle was a bit too low. Shit.

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Friday Bike-ness

By soiledchamois on April 18, 2014 in Cycling, Random

fridaysmotor

It was hard not to ride today given how nice it was outside today. It was harder still knowing that a bunch of my friends were riding the trails at MMCC today while I spent the day going to the doctors, baking bread, doing loads of laundry and hanging out with the B-Man who was off from school today. It’s not much of a life, but it’s the only one I got right now. Oh well, there was still much bike-ness crammed in there.

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Never Sure

By soiledchamois on April 17, 2014 in Food & Drink

I’m never sure whether to love fruit, hate fruit, laugh at fruit or be scared and run the fuck away from fruit. Jesus H., look at this strawberry! It looks like something they lopped off an old man’s back.

Other than a trip to the gym to work on my glutes and pecs, today was something less than special. Oh well, it could be worse.

Later.

The Trip Home

By soiledchamois on April 17, 2014 in Random

The Trip Home, Part I

I’m finally back from a whirlwind few days of travel. Wifey, B-Man and I headed back to Pittsburgh to be with family and say goodbye to Wifey’s grandmother. A long trip for a funeral is something that no one ever wants to do, nor is introducing your ten-year old son to the grieving process, but both are part of life.

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Soiled Chamois Rice & Beans

By soiledchamois on March 31, 2014 in Cat 5 Cooking

simplesausgerice

It’s sort of funny [not really] that nearly all of my favorite meals look like something that was scraped off the piss smelling coat of a bum passed out in an alley after three bottles of Wild Irish Rose and a “found” half eaten gas station burrito. Funny or not [mostly not], any combination of brown rice, meat, beans, peppers, onions and a bit of cheese usually results in me being fully satisfied in the gut (and more than a tad gassy).

Tonight’s rice & beans was based on what Bon Appétit magazine calls the “hottest trend to come out of American kitchens since the kale-splosion of 2012.” Tex-Mex-Cajun-Italian Fusion.

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When In Doubt: Pinch a Loaf

By soiledchamois on March 24, 2014 in Cat 5 Cooking

The past two days have been less than fun: more ongoing frigid winter temps, a tooth filling that may need worked on for a 3rd time (probably needing a root canal), a dead battery in Wifey’s clown car (due to a certain ginger haired 10-year-old leaving the door ajar overnight) and an ongoing battle with my thoughtless neighbors over their two big ass dogs that they leave out in their yard for hours at a time to relentlessly bark as if the rest of the neighborhood REALLY enjoys hearing them bark at anyone, everything, anything everyone! Yeah, I know this all minor shit, but the minor shit is adding up and I’m letting it get to me. I need spring!! (REAL spring).

With all the dead battery drama this morning I missed out on a ride (not that I felt like riding in 15 degree temps), missed my time window for going to the gym and I had NOOOOOOO desire what-so-ever to ride the trainer. So I did what any red-blooded, stressed-out, depressed, American male who doesn’t have a real job to go to would do; I baked bread.

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Après Race Essentials I

By soiledchamois on March 13, 2014 in Random

swordT

OK, now shit is starting to get better in my mental dojo! I just found The Sword Black River t-shirt. This is going to be perfect to wear après race this summer and will look awesome as I wield my (yet to be purchased) Viking sword at throngs of recovering racers with one hand and hold aloft a goblet of strong ale (or reasonable facsimile) in the other while screaming “MAKE YOUR STAND WITH THE GREAT HOUND, THE FRONTIER IS LOST! BLACK WATERS LIE BEFORE YOU, TOGETHER YOU CROSS!!” as Jake The Dog walks menacingly at my side (until he falls asleep in a pool of his own jowls).

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Little In Return & Bloody Knees

By soiledchamois on March 12, 2014 in Cycling, Random

paris_nice_1

This week has given me very little and in return I have given back even less. So far, aside from two trips to the gym (with varying results) and spending ten minutes on the stationary trainer before saying “fuck it, this is like the dumbest thing ever,” I have pretty much done nothing. And when I say “nothing,” I mean NOTHING. Well, unless standing at the back door and blindly staring out the window wondering what people with real lives are doing is something, but I am pretty sure that qualifies as nothing. I guess I could consult The Idiot’s Guide to Depressive Slack & Ennui for an official ruling, but I’m way too busy doing nothing .

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