The weather over the weekend was pretty crap: dark, grey, rainy, and quite cool for the unofficial kickoff of summer, unlike today, which is sunny and 75˚.
With Wifey somewhere in Ohio (I don’t really know, I think near some big lake… Lake Winnipesaukee or something like that), and B at his girlfriend’s parents’ for the holiday, I was left alone with Lola (the dog) for the weekend.
Being alone physically and feeling alone mentally is quite normal for me, and to be fair, I kind of like it. Or at least, I’m used to it. As a bonus, on a summer holiday weekend, many of the folks in our neighborhood go off to their lake “cottages” (second homes, because one home is clearly not enough), or go drunk boating somewhere on Suck My Wake. With that, I feel like I have the cul-de-sac to myself, and the volume of the music on the stereo is played accordingly.
I find that being alone on a holiday weekend also serves as a sufficient punishment for not having a “real” job anymore. For me, a holiday weekend is no different from a random Tuesday. I do the same things; I cook, clean, take care of the yard, run errands, do laundry, lumber, take photos, edit them, and write this crap.
It’s the same reason why I haven’t been on a vacation since 2019. What am I on a vacation from, grocery shopping? I know the chances that I’ll allow myself to actually relax, have fun, or feel as if I’m deserving of it in any way whatsoever are slim, and I’ll probably end up being a dick so as to prove to everyone that I am “right.” So, I find it’s better for everyone involved to simply pass. I do the same thing about a night out. Why risk being miserable amongst the public when I can be miserable at home?
Before you ask, yes, I have talked to the OG Mindbender about this many times over the years, but it doesn’t seem to stick. I think my core shame, self-loathing, and embarrassment is infinitely stronger than her positive mental powers and kindheartedness.
With all that mental hyperbole out of the way, I did manage to get out for a photo creep at Meridian Park on Saturday morning. I got a few bird shots, but nothing spectacular.
***
I also took my Nikon macro gear and got a couple of pics not far away from the parking lot. As seemingly nice as the macro shots are, they were mere feet away from empty cans of beer and a discarded pre-roll tube. That pretty much sums up how the seediness of modern life is never too far away from beauty.
As is my custom when I have the house to myself and the weather is shit, I get naked and watch lots of pornography I take the opportunity to cook or bake smething new. This weekend was homemade hoagie rolls. And GAHDAMN did they turn out great!! (pats self on fat back).
Come Sunday, it was do-or-die day for Tottenham, and for 90 minutes plus stoppage time, I cursed, gritted my teeth, and repeatedly wiped my sweaty palms as they hung on to a 1-0 win over Everton, thus securing Premier League football for next season. It was one of the most un-fun watches ever, and I really hope to never go through that again. I hate them.
All this leads us to today, Memorial Day, and rather than lumbering, I am getting caught up on some stuff and deciding whether the grass should be cut today or saved for later in the week. I’m thinking later in the week, and instead, stripping down to my gutchies, cracking some beers, and lying in the sun on the back deck like a beached whale as music booms from nearby speakers. Who am I kidding? Even if I were the last person on earth, there is no way I would have the self-confidence for gutchies on the deck!
Back to normal lumbering activities tomorrow.
Later.