Weeks and Lists

By soiledchamois on February 10, 2024 in Outdoors

I haven’t had what I’d call a “normal” lumber in the woods since the first week in January. The time in between has been spent doing the following:

Snowshoeing.
Walking the park service road.
Gravel Tramping®.
Stumbling and sliding on mushy snow while grinding my teeth down in rage and muttering cuss words.
Drinking too much beer while watching footy on TV as my penis retreats into my winter FUPA against his will. Sorry buddy, I’m working on it.

It’s been a hell of a month, but such is life.

With that said, after a few days of sun and temps in the high 50s, all the snow has melted.

Well, almost all of the snow.

I thought I was safe, and the trails would be clear; they were not. I should have conjured up my Nostrafuckingdamus-like powers to see that, but as we all know—I’m not that smart (and as we’ve already established, I’m no Nostrafuckingdamus).

About half of the trails were clear, about 25% were covered but pretty lumberable, and the rest were pockmarked, half frozen, half mush stretches that required the FULL use of trekking poles (which I thankfully had in the car) to stay upright. I was less than happy. I also had my trail sneakers on, not boots, and that sucked.

***

I did 3.5 miles on the trail and then bailed onto the service road to get 5 miles in before heading home.

But hey, let’s focus on the positives of the week (fuck yeah, more lists!):

Gravel Tramping® has been a lifesaver for me mentally, physically, and creatively this month. Not to mention, I am planning on making walking at pace on gravel roads the sport of the future (future, future, future..) and am working with an undisclosed manufacturer on a complete line of gravel shoes, gravel pants, gravel water bottles, gravel hats, gravel socks, gravel GPS watches, etc. It’s going to be “smokin’,” as the kids say. [They don’t say that; they say “fire,” and the fact that you just implicated it is a sure sign they are NOT even saying that any longer -ed] Look for all of these must-have Gravel® accessories in the month ahead.
After multiple weeks of failing to hit my 25-mile Winter Contingency Act goal, I completed it in just 4 lumbers.
I took a shit ton of photos.
We actually had sunshine for a couple of days.
Best of all, B-Man turns 20 today (Saturday), and while we won’t get to see him until tomorrow, he’s spending the day going to the Michigan State basketball game with friends and also wielding a press pass and shooting video for MSU. In other words, he’s going to have a pretty happy birthday doing what he loves, and Wifey and I are super proud of him. Go Green! (Go White!).