Tag Archives | unsolicited opinion

Before The Switch Flips

In the past few weeks, I have found myself with a renewed enthusiasm for “doing stuff” outside. While that has done nothing for the barely noticeable gains I’ve made strength training in the gym, it has done wonders for my mind, which every year around this time takes a dip in a stank vat of “fuck everything and everyone; yes, even you.”

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Wet Hike Lover

Last week was filled with near-daily lumbers through the woods with my camera, followed by a day off to let my 51-year-old body rest and recover; I was ready to get back at it on Monday and returned to Deerfield Park for a 4-mile hike in the cool, rainy woods.

The morning was dark with a rain that alternated between a steady drizzle and a refreshing misty spray that gave the woods a real Dagobah System feel (Google it, youngsters).

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Parts & Miles

I spent the last few weeks moping around the house, letting my parts boss me into a state of misanthropy and apathy, but after some time with the O.G. Mindbender, a conversation with those pesky parts, and doing little things like avoiding the Bed of Torment for any reason other than sleeping and Sexy Time, I have bounced back harder than a Super Pinky off the skull of an annoying child. At least for now.

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Lightening & Fungus

I usually try to get to the gym on Monday to lift heavy things for no reason and lumber on the treadmill; however, the weather was so perfect this past Monday that I just couldn’t bring myself to spend it inside Dysmorphic’s Gym™. So I headed to Deerfield Park for a hike/photo creep in the woods.

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Empty Nests, Creeps, & Sharks

The first week of Empty Nest Syndrome was everything I expected it to be and more. And by that, I mean that I had all the expected symptoms of missing B, but because Jason gotta Jason, I also threw in a few days of malaise, regret, self-loathing, ennui, self-flagellation (not the good kind), and learning to talk in the third person as I come to grips with now being what can only be described as virtually useless to society. I’m not sure why I needed my son to start college to point out the obvious again, but here we are.

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Digressing

I’ve been laying low on the posting as of late, mostly because I’ve done even less than I normally do. Sure, I made it to the gym a few times, but who cares if an aging, fat white dude goes to the gym or not? Actually, who cares if an aging, fat white dude does anything? I digress.

After a week filled with back spasms and shoulder issues, the next week greeted me with more bad luck and a slight summer head cold, followed a few days later by what I can only imagine was food poisoning; all I know is that my body felt like it was trying to expel a feces-covered demon via my intestinal track for 8 hours. I continue to digress.

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