Archive | December, 2014

A Few of My Favorite Things

By soiledchamois on December 31, 2014 in Cycling, Random

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It’s year’s end time, so rather than blather on about resolutions I won’t keep and plans that won’t happen, I thought I would put together a small list of my favorite Soiled Chamois blog posts from the past year. I’m not saying the posts were “technically” good or that they were the most read, they are just some of the ones that I enjoyed writing. I’m also not saying that you should like what I like, be your own person Goddamn it!

BTW, I regretted the title of this post as soon as I typed it, for it shares its name with the song A Few of My Favorite Things, which if it weren’t for the existence of the Paul McCartney & Wings holiday song Wonderful Christmastime it would possibly be my most hated song in the world. OR the song that I will most likely lose my mental shit to one day.

So here we are in no particular order, rhyme, reason or rank…

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Easing Back Into It

By soiledchamois on December 30, 2014 in Random

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The past week was its normal whirlwind of December holiday madness: travel, no riding, family visits, eating, weight gain, gift giving, gift receiving, more eating, occasional vomitorium visits (followed by quick weight loss), Boxing Day footy watching, a dash of stress, mild boredom, more weight gain, and lastly more travel (to which I set a personal record, making it from Pittsburgh to Mt. Peezy in 6:01, crushing my old record by 14 minutes!).

I always bitch about the holidays (mostly because I loathe them like an annual bout of gonorrhea), but every year they turn out pretty darn OK. Every year I look up at the faces I grew up with and those who helped create me, as well as the family I married into and realize that like it, love it, or not, these are the people in my world. Like they say, you can pick your friends but you can’t pick your family. Despite all the differences that we choose not to really get into and are content to leave hovering on the surface of our mental skins like infected spider bites, they are good people. There are lots of folks out there with worse problems, that’s for good-Goddamn sure.

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Holiday Blog Break

By soiledchamois on December 23, 2014 in Random

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Going on a blog break until after the Christmas holiday. Normal crap blogging will resume next week. I’m sure I’ll be sharing my own brand of holiday ~~misery~~ cheer on the Twitters and the Instagrams during that time.

Have a swell holiday.

Later.

A Brief Respite

By soiledchamois on December 21, 2014 in Cycling, Random

After 3.5 days of being ill, it was so awesome to wake up on Friday morning and not feel like I’d been drug through the street by a group of angry Stevie Wonder fans. It was even nicer to get me and my Goblin-ish chins and belly on the treadmill for a three-mile lumber, and nicer still to get out for a quick but satisfying 1:45 ramble on Michiganderburgh dirt roads via the Farley on Saturday. But…

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It Doesn’t Make Sense

By soiledchamois on December 20, 2014 in Cycling, Random

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Sometimes to stop something from driving you insane, you have to share it with someone. Since the therapist that I never really got around to making an appointment with–even though Wifey, my family, PCP and local law enforcement think I did–is off doing whatever nonexistent therapists do (I assume listening to NPR friendly Spanish guitar music whilst cutting the address boxes off covers of waiting room bound volumes of Architectural Digest), I will just share my thoughts with the Interwebosphere: Stevie Wonder is a prick!! Here’s why…

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The Cure: Beer & Beans

By soiledchamois on December 19, 2014 in Random

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The photo above is not from today, nor are the ones below. They could’ve been from today, but they’re not, they’re from a week or two ago when I was rolling dirt roads and shooting film with the Holga 135. One reason they could’ve been from today is because the sun FINALLY showed its face here in mid-Michiganderburgh again! Lord Jesus! But the main reason they’re not from today is because sadly, I did not ride. Boo!

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The Waste of a Week

By soiledchamois on December 18, 2014 in Random

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I had high-ish hopes for riding this week, especially with most of next week being occupied by Christmas travels and ~~festivities~~ madness. Unfortunately I came down with some sort of flu-like crud on Monday night and most of my time over the past few days has been spent coughing under several layers of blankets in the stinky confines of the Chamber of Farts. With that said, I haven’t been on the bike since last Sunday and I am starting to feel like I have a giant, cottage cheese filled ball sack for a chin and an extruded stomach that bounces and sways when I walk. In other words, I feel like the Great Goblin from the Hobbit.

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The Crud

By soiledchamois on December 16, 2014 in Random

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Last night, right after I hit the publish button on what will surely be known as the most widely unread blog post in Soiled Chamois history, I popped my normal shot of ZzzQuil and headed up to The Chamber of Farts that is my bedroom. An hour or so later I was still awake; I tossed, I turned, I coughed, I was hot, I was cold, I was sweating, I coughed again. “Wait, why do I keep coughing?” I thought to myself. Then it hit me…. I’m getting sick… I’ve got the crud! OH, FOR FUCK’S SAKE!

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Crush Pasta IV

By soiledchamois on December 15, 2014 in Cat 5 Cooking

Last week I made some pasta with (jarred) marinara sauce and homemade meatballs. As soon as I started eating it I found myself on my knees shaking my fork towards the food gods above, cursing them for letting me make pasta and jarred red sauce. Almost every time I eat it I end thinking it’s too salty and an evil bout of indigestion will be waiting for me within minutes of finishing. The only red pasta sauce I REALLY like these days is my homemade Bolognese sauce. With that said, I was in the mood for pasta today and remembered a recipe I made once last year that was pretty darn good and avoids straight up red sauce.

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Fogged Up, In, Whatever

By soiledchamois on December 14, 2014 in Cycling

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The past two days seem more like one long, soggy day. Both days featured pretty OK temperatures (for December in Michigan), gray skies and a fog so heavy that it coated all of Michiganderburgh like cold, stank, three-day old, dirty dishwater. In fact, after two days of riding through the fog on muddy, dank, dirt roads, I feel pretty much the way the photo above looks. Everything is cold and wet and we’ve not had actual rain or snow since Monday! What the stink?

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