All last week as I “ran” on the Dreadmill™, and spun my wheels going nowhere on the trainer, I set my mind to go down to the Cannonsburg Ski Area to take photos at the fat bike and snowboard races they were hosting. I figured I could use the practice and getting outside would do me good.
Outdoor riding continues to elude me for a variety of reasons; first because of the abundances of rutted ice on many roads, then because it got cold as shit outside and for some reason this winter I am lacking the motivation freeze my tits off. Please note that “lack of motivation” is just code for my laziness, but that’s your call.
You may wonder how the following relates to a cycling blog. Stick with it, I have a point eventually, you just have to sift through some ranting. Keep in mind there is surely a dose of hypocrisy, preachiness, and anger even though in my head it all makes perfect sense. Read at your own risk, or feel free to read something not a crap cycling blog. It’s totally your call.
Over the past few months I haven’t been sleeping very well. There are many “might-bes” and “could-bes,” which include such things as too much coffee, not enough riding, worry that my family’s entire world could come crashing down at any moment, and an ever-growing affection for nihilism. No matter the cause, counting sheep, masturbating, counting sheep masturbating, and masturbating while counting sheep only gets one so far, and I’ve found myself with time to think. This is both good (the time has allowed me to put some creative wheels in motion), and bad (see much of this paragraph). However in addition to all of that I have also had some thoughts that hover in the middle grounds between fond memories, existential ennui, and the want for simpler times.
There has been a distinct lack of things happening over the past week. Quality outside riding was once again shelved due to ice, then deep mud, then ice again, now more crap snow. Then my running was shelved because I stubbed my toe and ripped the toenail off (that felt just as you might imagine), which left it looking like it was gnawed on by a wolverine.
My family and I spent a long weekend back in Pennsylvania paying our respects to Wifey’s grandfather who passed away last Wednesday. It was a sad weekend indeed, but it was a beautiful ceremony and it did well to celebrate the life of a great man.
With all that car travel, sadness, stress, and a jam packed non-stop schedule came poor diet choices and a complete lack of exercise. I feel like I put on ten pounds in four days!
Now home, I was anxious to bet back into the routine of daily exercise and eating healthier home cooked foods. Sadly the weather would not been cooperating for outside activities. As I’ve mentioned before, the past two weeks it was ice and slush, most of that is gone but the dirt roads are a quagmire of mud and standing water. The paved roads are clear but today we were socked in with fog and misty rain most of the day and I somehow lost my rear blinky in the garage somewhere. Not wanting to be struck down by a cement truck, I needed options.
NOTE: Posting has been lagging lately due to the fact that most of my time spent “doing stuff” has been done indoors. There is no real creative joy in posting daily updates about crap three-mile runs on the treadmill. Hopefully I get outside soon. Crap or not, after a week of running/lumbering nearly 20 miles to nowhere I had time to think about the direction that I want to take my life. I’m not one for New Year’s Resolutions, or at least not very good at keeping them, but I am one to make a list of things that I will “try to do.” Not so much because it’s a new year, but just because. This is a long one, so I have split it into two posts.
This is Part II, and written for me more than anything else, so feel no need to read it, but this is the sort of stuff that goes through my mind as I run staring at a blank wall in front of me.
– Management
NOTE: Posting has been lagging lately due to the fact that most of my time spent “doing stuff” has been done indoors. There is no real creative joy in posting daily updates about crap three-mile runs on the treadmill. Hopefully I get outside soon. Crap or not, after a week of running/lumbering nearly 20 miles to nowhere I had time to think about the direction that I want to take my life. I’m not one for New Year’s Resolutions, or at least not very good at keeping them, but I am one to make a list of things that I will “try to do.” Not so much because it’s a new year, but just because. This is a long one, so I have split it into two posts.
This is Part I, and written for me more than anything else, so feel no need to read it, but this is the sort of stuff that goes through my mind as I run staring at a blank wall in front of me.
– Management
Part I (On The Couch Whilst Sitting In a Recliner)
New Year’s Eve had some promise; Wifey and I had the house to ourselves, good food to eat, and a fridge full of good beer. Sadly by 9:00 PM all that promise turned into Wifey pissed at me because of my opinion on how I can’t see any good that could possibly come from 2017 (I still stand by that, the world’s f*cked), and debating my talents (her words) and lack there of (my words) as I head into another year without a paycheck.
The winter thus far has left me with little motivation to get out on the bike. Prior to riding Sunday I had only ridden twice through the week; one freezing cold ride in the wind and snow drifts, and one short ride on the soft snow at Sally’s Trail down in Alma. The rest of the week was spent on the treadmill and lifting heavy things for no reason. I wanted to get outside on Saturday, and even went so far as to ready my snowshoes, but after I was done clearing the driveway of another five inches of snow, I lost my desire and found myself reaching for my Xbox controller and a bottle opener instead. Saturday would be Sloth Day.
Wednesday morning the Unit and I took off to the Fatherland (western Pennsylvania) for the Thanksgiving holiday. Most of the next four days would be filled with visiting family, eating, driving, eating, visiting family, arguing, driving, eating, and driving. My hope for Black Friday was to get up at the ass crack of dawn and head out to Walmart to get my hands on one of two 90″ Sonie™ flat screen TVs for $19.99. I’m joking of course, my goal was to sleep off my turkey coma, continue our family visiting, and if I was lucky get a window of opportunity to drive up to the mountains for a hike. Goal accomplished.