Tag Archives | fucking weather

Parts Amounting To Nothing

FRIDAY PART I

The past week has been an amalgamation of appointments, house duties, dad duties, holiday prep, dog care, and goofing off from the seat of my comfy chair while shoving handfuls of vitamin D down my throat and watching the last hints of summer tan drain away from my skin to leave it looking like the surface of a thrice-used teabag.

Continue Reading →

No Summer Hate

Given how much I hate Michigan winters, I will refrain from hating on Michigan summers. I mean, the summers are just fine for people not wearing a 90-pound fat suit and trying to ride their bike on shadeless dirt roads under the steamy mid-morning sun.

Continue Reading →

Everything in One Day

NOT REALLY QUARANTINED DAY ____.

After Tuesday’s WEDNESDAY’S walk in the woods was ruined, I was determined not to let weather, online appointments, Pandemic-A-Go-Go 2020, or the ever-raging fire of slack that burns in my belly, prevent me from getting outside to do something. Anything.

Continue Reading →

Promises Broken

Earlier this week, the talking weather heads predicted, nay, PROMISED warmer 40-ish degree temperatures for the mid-Mitten. They lied. I hate them.

Yeah, yeah, it wasn’t 25˚, it was in the low 40s/high 30s but with a good dose of gusting wind direct from the teat of the witch, so it felt like it was 25˚. It was your classic robbing Peter to get six and one-half dozen apples and/or oranges from one pocket to another to pay Paul to stay away from Mary (I think) scenario.

Continue Reading →

BANG! BANG!

Winter is not over. That much I’m sure of; this is Michigan after all, land of May snow flurries, and June sweater wearing. However, on Sunday, we got a nice reprieve from the grey skies and the sort of snow, sort of ice, frozen ejaculate that a modern-day mid-Michigan winter spews, with some blue skies, sunshine, and improved temps.

Continue Reading →

Weather Maker, No No No

It seems the beginning of 2020 has left me paralyzed with nothingness. Wait, no, that’s way too hyperbolic. Actually, I’ve just been a fleshy ball of slack and the innocent victim of uninspired connubial relations betweenst mythological weather makers.

Continue Reading →

Who Dis?

My excuses are longer than a porn star’s manhood. My slack is stronger than a pre-castrated bull. And my waistline’s girth and body weight are that of a Mart-Cart fatty with a basket full of Ding Dongs and Mountain Dew.

Continue Reading →

Dealing With Black Dogs

I’ve never been a great writer, but enjoy writing; thus, the continued publication of this blog. Sorry?

However, in the past couple of months, my posts have become more subpar than usual. One of the major factors has been the appearance of Lola (the dog) in my life. I love her, but she’s a puppy and puppies need near constant attention lest ye have your living room shat upon and chewed to bits. Every week she gets a little better, but finding moments of peace to sit down and write can be difficult when home alone.

Continue Reading →

More Wetness

After a fun time in the woods on my mountain bike Sunday morning, I was hoping for more of that today. Sadly, a Memorial Day spent mulching and planting, and Tuesday morning rains and house duties had me settling for a quick hike around the Bundy Hill Preserve.

Continue Reading →

Powered by WordPress. Designed by Woo Themes