Part I, Tuesday, 6:17 AM
I was up at 6 AM on Tuesday to tend to the dogs, drink giant mugs of coffee, make food, and slack around the internet in the dark, waiting for dark grey daylight sometime after 8 AM and a chance to get some miles in my feet.
Tag Archives | doing stuff
Finishing Early
It’s not the first time it’s happened to me, but this week, I once again suffered from Premature Mile Accumulation (PMA). Unlike more awkward premature “ations,” PMA leaves me feeling quite good about myself but similarly leaves me questioning, now what do I do, but with fewer sheepish apologies.
Last Day Again
2023 was a year filled with some ups and some downs, but as a whole, it was been one of the best years I’ve had in a long while.
I continued my nearly daily lumbers, lost a few pounds, and, most importantly, finally got my depression under better control. Not perfect, but better.
I only wish I felt as confident about 2024 and what America has in store for us. But, all I can do is keep on keeping on, ignore the news and half of the country, and continue to lumber on through the woods with my camera.
In a couple of days, I will be starting the next leg of my life rebuild tour with the 2024 Lumber Through Hell Tour, which starts on January 1st.
#2024LumberThroughHellTour
Until then, I am going to bask in the numbers my 52-year-old feet put up in 2023’s Soil The Woods Tour:
Total Hikes: 260
Todal Days Goofing Off/Not Hiking: 105
Total Distance: 1,294.76 Woodsy miles
Average Distance: 4.98 miles per hike
Average Time: 1:25:28 per hike
Longest Hike: 8.12 miles
And let us not forget that this whole lumbering shit show started back on September 19th, 2022, with the 2022 Not Dead Yet Comeback Special, and those numbers are as follows:
Total Hikes: 346
Total Distance: 1,657.04 Woodsy miles
Average Distance: 4.79 miles per hike
Average Time: 1:23:34 per hike
I remember back when I first crawled out of the Bed of Torment, walked past my bikes, laced up my hikers, and started lumbering away from my brain; I questioned how long I could sustain hiking at pace 20 to now 30 miles a week. Turns out it’s 468 days and counting, which averages out to 3.54 miles per day.
Pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty good.
-Larry David
While I am in NO way looking forward to the American political shit show that is coming in the months ahead and the possible end to our democracy as we know it in 2024, I am looking forward to more miles lumbering away from my problems. And people.
Photos are from Saturday’s sunrise hike when the temperatures dropped overnight and left the woods covered in a thick later of frost.
Later.
Numbers, Miles, & Pipes
Sometimes, the numbers don’t add up.
The Bounce Back
After my First World mental meltdown concerning aging, being stupid, mobile phones, frozen Apple I.D. accounts, and realizing that I’m 52 years old, offer nothing to society and get the same in return, I said that I would bounce back like a fat kid through a trampoline. Well, I am happy to report that I bounced back and then some by lumbering over 30 miles in 5 days; to hell with the trampoline-breaking fat kid; this week, I was bouncing back like the glutes of Big Sean’s lady friend!
The Best of The Worst
I got out on Monday for a 6.75+ lumber, half of which was done in a thunderstorm, and I have to say it was pretty magnificent. Plodding along through the dark woods with rumbling thunder and lightning overhead and rain pissing down shouldn’t be as fun as it is, but it is. And I only almost pissed myself once with fear.
Woodsy Walks & Porch Frogs
This was a busy week of lumbering, living solo, and taking care of two fart-scented bulldogs while Wifey was off doing what she does while working in Baltimore most of the week.
What does that mean? Not much, other than an hour or so in the early evening, was spent cursing football’s international break, slacking, and goofing off rather than cooking Wifey one of my meatless white trash specialties.
A Tale of Two Augusts
In August of 2022, I was just starting to feel more like my old self (the one who enjoys pushing himself physically outside, preferably in the mountains woods, and doing so without wanting to take a dirt nap), but still not there yet.
Midweek Nonsense
Monday
After two days in a row off from lumbering, I was looking forward to getting back into the woods on Monday.
I felt refreshed, and my feet felt great over most of the 8.03 miles. However, I did need to deviate deep into the woods at one point for an emergency evacuation of what remained of the morning’s mug of coffee and veggie sausage, egg whites, and cheese breakfast burrito. So, that was less than fun. I knew I kept that plastic baggie filled with wipes in my bag for some reason. Seriously, you would think going multiple times before leaving would be enough, gahddamit.
The Hateful Eights
At the risk of violating my 2023 resolution, I have been deep into a late summer funk brought forth by my ongoing battle with heel pain, B heading back to MSU tomorrow, a burning hatred for half the country (and 95% of mid-Michigan’s population), and my long-perfected loathing for myself and my extensive list of shortcoming and failures as a man.
Additionally, I have also been made aware by persons close to me that my lack of desire to “go out” for social interactions has become unacceptable.