This morning I sat at the computer drinking coffee and mapping out a ride that I hoped would come close to yesterday’s mileage and have me in the 40 to 45 mile range. Then I walked upstairs.

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Playing The Percentages


After two days off the bike for various reason (laziness + shit to do) I was back on the bike for some miles today. With my time at the shop on hold for the foreseeable future, my thesis in limbo (that’s a joke of course) and B-Man back in school, I can now start to set my sights on trying to get some longer (for me) rides in and try to burn as much man fat as I can in between my husbandly duties (don’t judge!). Because before you know it, the snow will be flying and I’ll be reduced to twenty mile fat bike rides on ice packed dirt roads while freezing my tits off.

During the balls of the summer I limited my weekday riding to the 25 to 35 mile range so as to be closer to home if B-Man needed anything. Now I can start adding a few more miles in here and there or make my way to some trails to get my knobs in the dirt. Well, at least until open interviews for Panda Express start up. Nothing like a forty-four year old white man serving up Chinese food.


Today I headed out for a ride that I always thought of being roughly 70% paved. It turns out I was pretty damn close. Since I have nothing better to do that think about crap like this, I broke down the surface mileage for this 45.9 mile road ride.

Mileage Breakdown:
3.50 miles pavement
7.54 miles dirt/gravel
5.54 miles pavement (two miles being shit pavement)
2.99 miles dirt/gravel
1.00 miles pavement
1.00 miles dirt/gravel
6.98 miles pavement
2.98 miles dirt/gravel
14.34 miles pavement

31.36 miles pavement
14.54 miles dirt

From my best guess, that is around 68% pavement, which is close enough to 70% for me. What does all this mean? Um… ah… well.. IT MEANS IT WAS A PRETTY FREAKING GOOD GUESS! Unless my math is wrong, then it’s jut further proof I’m a goddamn moron.


The stats for this ride are pretty much upside down compared to how I normally like my rides, but barring the first few miles and the last couple miles out of and into town, the roads on this ride are my kind of roads: low traffic, hilly, rolling farm roads combined with and pavement that is complete and utter shit. Then as a bonus there was 14.5 miles of dirt and gravel.


In fact, some portions of the paved roads are so bad that it was actually smoother and faster on the dirt roads, especially on roads like the one seen above wich were packed down hard with nothing but some horse and cart tracks to slow you down.

Having said all that, this route has become one of my favorites, despite its asphalt handicap. And the Boone continues to be the perfect bike for these rides too! Having done these rides on a variety of bikes, for a variety of reasons, I can say that there was no point on dirt that I wished I was on my mountain bike and there was no point on pavement that I longed for my road bike. This is truly the happiest I’ve been on bike in some time.

Thankfully I got out and back before the heat of the day came on strong. I actually made it back with some water to spare. Of course that could be because the water became as warm as hobo’s piss during the ride, and even quick sips were disgusting.

Hopefully I can crawl out from my den of slack again tomorrow and get a few more miles in.


Doing What’s Necessary


Sometimes you get up and go for a bike ride. Sometimes you don’t. Today I did not, but I did stick to my almost daily plan of doing something outside and doing something creative by going for a quick three-mile hike in the woods in between bits of real life.

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First Half Time Trial


After getting up this morning, I set about drinking coffee, watching football and writing a crap blog post about yesterday’s ride. I finished the post by contemplating a fat bike ramble or a Better Than The Trainer Ride™. In the end I opted for the 26.5 mile B.T.T.T.R™ that was 98% pavement.

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Friday Forty-Six


This week I found myself doing more road riding than in I have in a while. Well, not real skinny tire, hi-viz kit wearing, cafe stopping, kilometer talking, take your pull and follow the unwritten rules road riding, but rides in which I spent a higher percentage of time on paved roads (or what passes for paved in Michigan) than on dirt and gravel. Case in point: yesterday’s forty-six mile roll through the mythical rural landscapes of Mighiganderburgh atop the Boone.

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Foiled But Fine


My ride today sort of got foiled, but for good reasons. Well, not GOOD reasons, but reason. I’ve been struggling to find some parts for a sliding shelf that broke in our pantry for a week. After exhausting the big box hardware stores in the area I finally took the time to stop in a local kitchen and cabinet place see if they knew what the part was even called, if they had any, and if so, where could I find said part. Well, they didn’t know what to actually call the part, but they dug around in an old parts bin and found me two parts that were ALMOST what I needed and gave them to me nuthin’.

In any event, the parts were close enough to what I needed and all I had to do was put add a little 1/8 shim (actually taken from the two broke parts) for it to work. The fix is pretty ghetto right now, but the drawer is back in pantry and it slides; for now that will do. At least I’m on the trail of what the part actually IS and should be able to order some soon to make a more permanent ghetto fix.

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Hanging Low & Blowing Up


I’m not one to complain about weather (that’s a lie, I love to bitch about it), but the goddamn sun could shine again any day now! Today is the fourth day in a row that dark gray skies and dank, unusually chilly August temperatures draped over mid-Michigan like an octogenarian hobo’s scrotal sack. The lack of sun is normal back in my old state, but from my experiences with Michigan the past five summers, this is pretty unusual. Of course in two months I’ll be bitching about the fact that I got snowed on during my ride or crashed on ice. A goddamn meteorological malcontent is what I am (amongst other things).

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Blood, Clouds & Cows


Busch Light on dirt.

My Monday morning was spent in my doctor’s office for a six month check up on my blood thinners and to get some blood work done. After that I drove all over Mount Pleasant looking for (and failing to find) some replacement parts for sliding drawers in the panty. I probably could have squeezed a ride in there somewhere, but to tell you the truth the low, dark clouds that hung over central Michigan, gusting winds, and temps in the high fifties just made me want to drink coffee and curse the reality of being a home owner. HOUSE GODS, WHY DO YOU MOCK ME??

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The MJU II Project No. 3 & 4


This post has even less to do with cycling than most of my posts do these days. The closest you’ll get to cycling here is that nearly all of the photos in the post (except for the one above) were taken while riding my bike. The following has to do with my continuing forays into shooting photos with old point and shoot film cameras. Instead of rehashing all the reasons why I tracked down an Olympus MJU II (also known as the Stylus Epic) camera several months ago, I will just refer you to the posts The MJU Project No. 1The MJU Project No. 2.

Now on with this post…

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When I woke up this morning I had no REAL intention of riding. I figured that I would sit around, watch a ton of soccer football all day (BPL, Bundesliga and maybe even the lackluster MLS), drink some adult beverages, eat some white trash Mexican food, then head to bed, where I would sleep like shit for eight hours before starting another cursed week on this shit hole of a planet on Monday.

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